Ramblings.

May 3, 2011

I feel so behind on blogging. I always have a mental list of posts that I want to do, but actually getting around to doing them is another story. So for today, I’m just going to ramble. Organized picture posts to come later this week & next week (fingers crossed)! For now, random thoughts & updates on life:

1. I had my baby shower this past Saturday & I feel a huge weight off my shoulders. Partially cause I was just so nervous about being the center of attention (I’d been having flashbacks to my bridal shower two years ago of me chewing a giant wad of bubble gum & sheepishly opening lingerie in front of ~50 women…) & partially cause I feel like I can just buy what I need to buy now. I have awesome sisters-in-law & friends, who were so sweet to put so much thought into planning this shower. The food was soooo good, the decor soooo cute, and everything so laid-back & easy. Thanks friends. :) Can I get pictures someday?

2. We also did some major purging & organizing on Sunday night. The walk-in closet in the baby room had become a nightmare — bags & bags of baby clothes, boxes of art supplies, kitchen appliances, etc. We ended up buying a dresser from Ikea on Sunday (finally) & I just stuffed all the cloth diapers & baby clothes in there. Enormous washing session to come later this week. And yes, we are cloth diapering! But that deserves a separate post altogether. :) Anyhoots, we both felt sooooo good & clean & light after we organized. The baby room is sparse, but at least it doesn’t look crazy anymore. Yes, I will post pictures… later.

3. I have officially begun to waddle. It is embarrassing & I try my best to walk straight, but it’s just uncomfortable to keep my legs together! I also feel so much pressure low in my belly. Is this what it feels like when the baby drops? Or does it get worse? On a similar note, my growing belly is causing problems in the wardrobe department. This morning I vowed to work out & actually thought I would try swimming since it’s been so hot the last two days. I squeezed on my bikini I last wore on our honeymoon & pulled a tank top over, but I just looked plain cuh-razy. So I changed my mind & decided I should go walking at the gym. Very sad to discover that my Hurley shirt doesn’t fit anymore & I have no decent comfy shorts to wear (the shorts I wear at home are Steven’s old boxers, but I would be mortified if anyone saw me in them). I then tried on one of Steven’s t-shirts & basketball shorts, but I just looked like a puny little Asian boy in oversized clothes. My solution? Give up on working out & take a shower instead.

4. My parents are currently vacationing in Korea. They’ve been there for about a week now & have two more weeks till they come back home. I didn’t realize how dependent I am on talking to them on the phone everyday until I couldn’t call them. My mom really has become my best friend over the past few years — I can’t imagine life without her. Sometimes I wish we lived closer to each other, but then I think, maybe our relationship is better because we’re further apart. Likely so. I’m so thankful that they’re coming to stay with us for a few weeks after the baby is born. From what I hear from other moms, I will need it. Badly.

5. Lately I am really starting to enjoy cooking. Haha, that sounds strange, but I actually don’t really love cooking very much. I feel like I never had a chance to really become comfortable with cooking during our first year of marriage. Cooking is one of those things where you have to develop a rhythm — once the rhythm’s broken (by eating out too much or getting sick & not cooking), it’s so tough to get back into it. These past few months have been great though — I have been excited to try out lots of new recipes & dare I say it, even do some menu planning?! I’ve been surprised by how not difficult it is & how rewarding it is to have new dishes prepared for Steven when he comes home from work. So if you have some easy, somewhat healthy, yummy recipes, please send them my way! Seriously.

6. I am feeling less anxious about motherhood now than I was during my second trimester. You’d think it’d be the opposite way around, right? I think I’ve just accepted that it will be hard & that I’ll get through it somehow. It helps to hear from moms who are honest about the challenges of the newborn stage, but who also emphasize just how deep & incredible a mother’s love for her child is. People liken it to having your heart ripped out and pinned to your chest. A little scary, but also incredibly exciting. That’s definitely something I can’t fathom yet & am so looking forward to experiencing. :)

Okiedokes, I think I will stop now. There is so much more swimming in this crazy mind of mine, but I’m sure it’s not that interesting to everyone else. Will try to be better about doing more bite-sized posts more frequently rather than these crazy long-winded rambling posts once every month. Till next time! <3

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